Therapeutic letter writing
Therapeutic letter writing
Therapeutic letter writing can help you process strong emotions. A letter can be used to process situations where you have been wronged or within relationships or any other situation where direct communication might be tricky.
Why do it?
The goal of the letter is to allow you to explore your thoughts and feelings and possibly re-frame your story. Aspects of the experience you have not dealt with can be brought into greater awareness and the process may even help you find forgiveness and ultimately be able to move on.
Will they get to read it?
The letter does not have to be sent to the person(s) concerned (even if that were a possibility) although I recommend that the letter is nevertheless ‘posted to nature’ in some ritual manner. This can be by burning, shredding, burying or placing in water (or some combination of all these).
What goes in the letter?
The letter can contain all your emotions, needs, demands and condemnations towards the person or object. You can be explicit, truthful, uncensored, and express whatever you want to say in a raw and crude form. Don’t worry about spelling, presentation or handwriting.
Why is it a good idea?
The letter can be used to express anger, compassion, gratitude, sadness, love, or to grant or ask for forgiveness. Whatever the situation, a therapeutic letter can be a safe way to express everything you have been holding inside and allow your truth to be spoken.
How do I start then?
I have set out some possible starter topics below. You might find that once you get started it will all just flow out of you.
I don’t/didn’t like it when you……..
I’m angry that you…………..
It hurt(s) me when you………….
I feel so sad thinking about………………
I’m disgusted by the way you…………
I don’t understand why…….………
I get scared when………………
I regret that…………………….
I’m sorry that…………..
I forgive you (Please forgive me) for………………
In some cases (especially when you may be going to send the letter to a partner or friend) you can add:
I would like you to………………….
I appreciate you for……………….
How I want you to respond is……………..
I care about you and want………………..
I love you for……………….